some things are better left unspoken

it's been October and its almost end. i was happy actually, because i was accepted at Medical Faculty of Maranatha University, Bandung. but in the other side many things make me feel useless and unsafe. what's wrong with me? everything doesn't go well as what i  expected. Upset. i have so many problems with my parents, they were too egoist, they just want to speak but none of them wants to listen. then a problem with my dearest bestfriend, Nyok. arrrggghhh he has a prospective girlfriend and she's so vicious. she was displeased with me sometimes she get jealous easily on me when me and him had a funny conversation on BBM, she was very restrict our friendship (me&nyok). Is she never had a bestfriend? poor you girl. dear you, i decided to call you Bitch, it doesn't matter if you are going out with my best friend, but please respect me as his bestfriend Bitchy snacky. haaahhh i really miss my bestfriend, i swear. now because of her we kept distance, we're not talking each other. i really miss how he treats me when i'm sad and really need advises and motivations also. now i have so much to tell to him but i can't. i miss our laughs. i miss the most the way he treats me like I was his little sister. our friendship is being tested, really. blaaahhhh..... then another problem is i really miss Utik! she was my bestfriend since childhood. our friendship has been 13years. very a long time and we were like sister and our family were like big family. She left me in Bali and continue her studies one year earlier than me in Jakarta at Indonesia University while I'm still a SHS's student. When there's no one would listen, she's the only one. then a few weeks ago i met a boy (because he's not yet a man), we had a very long conversation and as the times goes on he made me feel like i was the only one, the he left me. i didn't know what happen before, we just lost each other, we were not talking and we never had chat again, never ever. he lost. maybe he has eaten by dinosaur, rest in peace bro just wait and watch Karma will catch you.

duuhh everything around me seems like unfriendly to me. am i that strange? or God has done the best way to save me from all bad things? what can i do? nothing. who can i tell about it? no one. some things are better left unspoken. cheers up, pretty sugar. but i really thank to God, because he always gives me strength to stand on my feet to face and finish every problems that came to me with my own ways.